Living with a Woman

1. Little shampoo bottles

2. Tucked in sheets

3. Pet cats

4. Tea candles

5. Everything is plural

Save the Date

I'm lobbying to have this be our "Save the Date."



I'm thinking self-mailer? Regardless, Aly has to make the logo bigger.

Copy:

John text bubble: Are we really doing this?

Aly text bubble: Oh, we're doing this.

Ratios

You can approach the math however you would like, but the end solution in a good relationship always ends up with decision making ratio of 60/40.

I say “always,” but I guess I really mean “aggregate average.”

One exception, I’ve come to discover over the past month, is when the topic is wedding planning. In this case it skews more 70/30. Or even 80/20.

Ehh…**shutter** 80/20…

Wedding planning, among many other descriptors, has been a treat. Truthfully, Aly and my wedding objectives are strategically in the same direction:

1. Great Environment
2. Family-like Interaction
3. Much Fun/Dancing/Shenanigans

Tactically, on how those are executed, not so much.

Whereas I would like to hire a bona-fide Cuban to hand roll cigars and enhance the “Great Environment” bucket, Aly believes that “Designer Wedding Dress” is the most important line item under that category.

Aly’s creativity really shines when she works to support this point, by the way.

Or say, I would like to do the champagne toast with Guinness while Aly would prefer to enhance the family-esque interaction with mounds of olive oil and fresh baked bread.

This is not to say that one direction is better than the other. It’s just funny how two different approaches get melded into a day about both. And, at the same time, creates the tactical minutiae that leads to the type of discussions which make planning a wedding such a pain in the ass.

The additional factor is the budget. While a very clearly defined financial space enhances your creativity with the execution, it sometimes comes at the expense of other ideas.

I’m crossing my fingers that the most creative (and affordable) ideas win out on the day. Knowing the two of us, I think they will.

And as for the decision making ratio, I would imagine (and hope) the ratio dips back to 60/40. And, the great irony about the 60/40 relationship? It’s that both parties think they are on the 40 end of the spectrum.

So, if you are both giving 40, where does the other 20 go?

A: Otis.

The Rooster, The Chick and The Ring

Aly likes to remind me of the non-engagement factor we have brewing in our relationship.

Her heated, animated and dramatic depictions have obscurely described her feelings of a “less than desirable” situation.

My favorite interaction to date, took place last night.

Fueled by red wine and estrogen from her monthly girls-only get together, she returned home to engage (pun intended) in the topic.

“So, why aren’t we?” was the ambiguous kickoff to the conversation.

The half-assed, “what are you talking about?” put us squarely in discussion mode.

Back and forth volleys uncovered reoccurring topics. Top line being one person is more than ready to make the jump and one person is probably close to the edge, but not ready to parachute down into the matrimony abyss.

The pinnacle of the conversation, and motivation for sharing this story, peaked with Aly authoritatively stating:

“What are you waiting for? A chick to hatch?? Well, I have news for you – I am not a rooster!”

While the literal translation is up for discussion, she makes the implied translation crystal clear.

She has a way of doing that.

To her credit, Aly has a perfect demeanor about the whole situation – patient and thoughtful. It’s the times when those brew over that make the most interesting.

I felt compelled to share this, if for no other reason, to show how someone has successfully used a rooster hatching an egg as an analogy for engagement trepidation.


As a post-script to this story, my relationship saga seems to make its way into conversations with co-workers - what I’m attributing to working with 86% women.

Tuesday I showed up to work wearing a sweater, my number 1 jeans* and big boy shoes** - what I thought to be acceptable clothes for a cold and snowy Minneapolis winter day.

By the end of the day Thursday, allegedly was not only engaged but had a baby on board.

Colle+McVoy needs to hire more men.


*Number 1 jeans refer the ranking system all men have for their jeans. Men rank jeans in order of preference – favorite jeans as Number 1, second favorite as Number 2 and so on.

Whether men admit to doing this or not is moot – all do it subliminally. Also to note, men do not buy jeans that will not become their new Number 1.

I would hypothesize women do this as well, however, I have no proof.


**Not skateboarding shoes.